Why we chose an independent adoption?

When Dave and I knew that we were no longer going to pursue having a biological child, we discussed which direction of adoption we were going to pursue. Here are some the most common types of adoption:

* International
* County Adoption/ Foster to Adopt
* Independent

We automatically ruled out international because we both knew that this was not necessarily where are heart was leading us and we have children here right at home that need families. Next we had to decide if we were going through the county or go independent. Their are positives and negatives to both but what it came down to at the time was "where was our heart?". You see, to us, adoption isn't just how you build a family, it is a ministry. We really felt as if the Lord was directing us to an independent adoption at this particular time. This is not saying the Lord closed the door to adoption through the county.

I can tell you that we did and still face criticism for this decision. The MOST common question I get is "doesn't it cost a lot and why would you pay so much money for a baby?"

Although, I can understand this question, I have to say, this was the direction God directed us. When Dave and I learned about an independent adoption we felt more passionate about it. Here is a why. When a woman is pregnant she has the choice to parent, abort, or place her baby for adoption. Most often if a woman doesn't find it convenient to parent, then she exercises her right to "choice" and chooses to have an abortion. But oh the few that choose life!! The ones that know they can't or shouldn't parent and love their baby so much they offer a better life knowing that it is going to take every ounce of strength to be able to do it. Just as I write this, my heart drops in reverence for these women and men.

What an honor to go through this process with one of these women. To be with her as she makes the most difficult decision of her life and offering her the hope that only Christ can give. To love her, to respect her and to honor her for her decision. What a beautiful story we would be able to share with our child. To tell our child that his/her mother loved them so much they offered them more than they could give and us who sought them out and waited. What a perfect love story.

After learning all this my question is why wouldn't we choose an independent adoption. Well I will be honest, our biggest struggle was the finances. Every time I would research the cost I kept thinking God how can we ever do this? But Dave and I kept praying and waiting for God to direct us. After all, money is just a tool God uses. He is the creator of our world, He just used money to grow our faith. Then one day we realized we have spent more money for a house, a car, multiple cars...so why were we agonizing so much over the money for an adoption?

So to encourage those considering this type of adoption or to answer critics... Aren't children more valuable than all of these things combined? All the things of this Earth are going to fade away, but the souls of these children are eternal. Adoption is God's design, if it is His will, then He will provide the tools.

So we stepped out in faith and God has blessed us abundantly! It is amazing how His presence has been seen throughout every aspect of the adoption process. I look forward to sharing with how we chose the Adoption Center of San Diego and how God used this process to grow our faith and relationship with Him. All glory goes to Him!